Socially Conscious Leadership from the Inside Out
Our guest this week has come to believe that “No matter how wonderful a program is, if it is done as a bestowing – a certain group of people making decisions for another group – that is never going to bridge the divide in our city.” Does your work fit within this paradigm of “bestowing,” and how do you plant seeds for a deeper mindset or consciousness shift to address underlying structural issues? Share Your Reflection »
Dallas-based therapist, activist, writer, community leader and speaker Michelle Kinder examines and teaches conscious leadership “from the inside out.” She offers practical, achievable steps for parents, teachers and others to support children’s social-emotional health, and for business and other leaders to drive transformation in their lives and organizations. While exploring the lack of mental health resources in southern Dallas, Kinder got to know the work of the Momentous Institute, a 99-year-old Dallas-based nonprofit organization that has been building and repairing social-emotional health through education and mental health programs. Momentous Institute serves vulnerable children through therapy services, curriculum and teacher training focused on See full.
Five Questions for Michelle
What Makes You Come Alive?
Thank you for asking. Learning makes me come alive. Learning combined with contribution has long been a winning formula for me feeling most alive. Over the years I developed the habit of checking in with myself every six months or so with the questions “Am I learning? Am I contributing?” There have been interesting seasons on how the two balance each other. There are times that striving to contribute crowded out the kind of white space by brain needs for deep learning and I have had to course correct. And there have been other times that I was learning a lot, but didn’t feel like I was being a good steward in terms of making a difference for other people or for causes I care about. I should also say that because I am currently in a season of more white space and more time for discernment, increasingly, simple pleasures are what make me come alive. Listening to birds, watching our dogs, yoga, running, sunshine, good coffee and the sound of my girls laughing together. Things like that.
Pivotal turning point in your life?
When I was in High School I left my family in Guatemala and came to the states to attend boarding school. It was a transformational experience. The wonderful faculty there saw qualities in me that they nurtured into leadership and I really learned who I was and what I was capable of during those four years. Interestingly, in my previous school, there were teachers who experienced the exact same qualities as problematic, annoying or something to control. Having that experience has made me very interested in how adults show up in the lives of children in a way that respects the enormous privilege and responsibility. I always say there are no neutral interactions when it comes to our relationships with children – all interactions are either positive, negative or missed opportunities.
An Act of Kindness You’ll Never Forget?
When I was in college, my 24-year-old sister died suddenly and it was an enormous challenge to go back to school while navigating the grief process. Several weeks into it, when people had stopped checking in, I found a card tucked into one of my books. It was from a classmate I knew somewhat, but not super well. It said something like, “I know time has passed but your hurt hasn’t.” I still tear up thinking about that act of kindness. It meant so much and it has shaped my desire to show up for others in similar ways.
One Thing On Your Bucket List?
Have the kind of flexibility to visit different places for a month at a time and work remotely while folding into the local scene.
One-line Message for the World?
Regardless of the situation, if you ever aren’t sure how to be most helpful, regulate your own nervous system.
***************************************************************************************************
Awakin Circles: A hub for local meditation circles that started in the Silicon Valley and have now spread to 80+ cities around the globe. The circle start with an hour of silence, followed by a circle of sharing and dinner in silence. A newsletter with a passage selected from various wisdom traditions and an audio reading is sent out to 87,000 subscribers each week. See also Awakin Calls that hosts weekly conversations with wide-ranging thought leaders.
***************************************************************************************************
ServiceSpace is an organization run entirely by volunteers. We leverage technology to encourage everyday people around the world to do small acts of service. Our aim is to ignite the fundamental generosity in ourselves and others, creating both inner and outer transformation.
ServiceSpace was conceived by volunteers, was built by volunteers, and is run by volunteers — all for the benefit of volunteers. Our projects range from a daily positive news service, to an acts-of-kindness portal, to a gift-economy restaurant. Regardless of the endeavor, we act in concert to create service opportunities for each other and to support each other’s service journeys.
In September of 2011, we formally changed our name from CharityFocus to ServiceSpace. Founded in 1999, ServiceSpace was originally started to help non-profits with technical services. Over the past dozen years, the organization has become an umbrella for many generosity-driven projects. Thus we have expanded our services from focusing just on helping charities, to encouraging everyday people to contribute in meaningful ways to the world around them. As the name suggests, our new expanded ServiceSpace platform allows people to stay connected with others interested in service, participate in service opportunities through any of our dozen projects, organize their own local service event using our tools, and stay connected to inspirational content. Above all, we believe in the inherent generosity of others and aim to ignite that spirit of service. Through our small, collective acts, we hope to transform ourselves and the world.
We hold these three principles steadfast within our organization:
Stay fully volunteer-run.
ServiceSpace was founded by volunteers and is run by volunteers. There is no paid staff, no office, and no central facilities. All ServiceSpace programs are conceived, designed, implemented, and administered by people who selflessly give their time so that others can benefit from those services.
Based on twelve years of our experience with a volunteer-run infrastructure, we’ve developed a streamlined process that structures projects in a distributed and decentralized manner. This allows more volunteers to give small chunks of time and still deliver high quality services to the end-receiver.
Being volunteer-run also allows us to organically self-organize. Instead of hierarchies and prefabricated business plans, our volunteer infrastructure is dynamic, low-cost and open to radical change. Everything is based on relationships and presence, and that creates a powerful context to BE the change.
We continue to be amazed at what inspired and dedicated individuals can do. Margaret Mead eloquently said, “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever does.” We could not agree more.
Serve with whatever we have.
We have chosen a slightly different path than most organizations, and choose not to focus on fundraising, grants, or other sources of revenue – for example, none of our websites contain any advertisement. All services are distributed are gifted without any fees. Thus, we serve with whatever support and resources that come in organically when people are truly moved to give.
ServiceSpace projects are built within a gift-economy system, an economic system in which goods and services are given freely, rather than traded. In a traditional market economy, one’s wealth is increased by saving. In a gift economy, giving leads to increase: an increase in connections and relationship strength.
Our services are given freely, without asking for anything in return. Instead of scarcity and fear for an uncertain future, our second principle roots us in abundance and trust. We have realized that over time, if you serve with pure intentions, people’s cups of gratitude overflow. They don’t give to fulfill a need, they give as an expression of their own solidarity and joy. These genuine gifts, no matter how small or large, are what sustains us.
Focus on the small.
Our attempt is to do “small acts with great love”. As our tagline says, “Change Yourself, Change the World.” If we started out by having a goal to change the world, we might have been a little disappointed in our abilities; when we start with ourselves, we notice that the ripples around us continue to get bigger and bigger and as more people try to do small acts, we have every potential to change the world.
Just as every tiny bit of a hologram contains information of the whole, we feel that paying attention to the process, to the present moment, gives us plenty of information to become instruments of a larger, systemic change.
This is how ServiceSpace makes things happen. But essentially the engine that drives the organization is inspiration, pure and simple. We learn from each other, spur each other, help each other, and frequently amaze each other. Sure, we are stirred by the words and lives of great men and women like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and Mother Theresa; but the examples set by our ServiceSpace colleagues–everyday heroes–are the real sustaining forces behind our projects.